SKILLS AND CONCEPTS OF CONFLICT MANAGEMENT CONFLICT BACKGROUND The first, and most important, thing to understand about conflict is that it is a natural and inevitable part of living. As a result of being involved in conflicts of varying degrees almost everyday, people have developed their own responses to conflict. Some people vary their responses to a conflict situation depending on the type of conflict or on the type of relationship they have to the person involved in the conflict. Other people choose to use one approach for all conflicts regardless of varying factors or relationships. Conflicts are abundant because individuals are unique, and therefore, have different values, needs and desires. Often, conflict is not about right and wrong, but about differences. Managing conflict is difficult for many individuals because they have not been taught how to resolve differences in cooperative, nonviolent ways. Within each person is a natural and primitive "fight or flight" response to conflict. Although it enabled the earliest human beings to survive in dangerous environments, it sometimes causes an individual's response to conflict to be inappropriate. Adrenaline provides the strength for flight (avoidance) or fight (attack). Conflict management education and practice provide the strength for moving beyond reactionary "fight or flight" responses. Conflict management programs are built on the belief that there are other appropriate responses that can be learned. Disputes can be resolved without attacking and without avoiding. Communication and problem solving methods can be employed to bring about win-win solutions. The challenge to the teacher is to insure that appropriate ways of responding to conflict receive commensurate positive recognition and reinforcement. A first step in developing appropriate responses is to gain some understanding about conflict. Conflicts can be simple or very complex depending on the type or number of causes. Conflicts can and should be analyzed in many different ways. If the nature of a conflict is understood, the possibility of achieving a lasting resolution is greatly enhanced. A conflict can be analyzed by the methods listed below. • intrapersonal, interpersonal, group or international conflicts •basic needs: power, belonging, freedom, fun, and security •sources of conflict: possessions, environment, opinions, methods, beliefs, and control • types of conflicts: challenge to authority, limit-testing, recreational conflict, expected conflict, encoded cultural conflict, and substantive conflicts The Chinese use two symbols to express the word "crises." One symbol stands for danger, the other for opportunity. Those who dread or avoid conflict seem to see only the potential for danger that a challenging situation holds out. A very positive outcome of conflict management education is the ability to see the possibilities, the opportunities, contained in each conflict situation.     Youth pattern their beliefs and attitudes on those modeled for them. As a teacher you will have many opportunities to help the students develop the habit of seeing the positive side to conflict by welcoming and using the many challenges that arise in the classroom to practice conflict management skills. It is very important that the students experience success in using the skills and applying the concepts they are taught. Because aggressive behavior is often rewarded, it is important for you to encourage, recognize, and appreciate students' efforts to use conflict management skills. If safety is an issue for children in your classroom, they need to feel confident that the skills you are asking them to practice will be safe in your classroom. One way to achieve this is by talking with your students about what works in "our" classroom. CURRICULUM INDEX
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